From Within My Fortress

work in progress

I am trying to be and become more nuanced in my relationship to the world and to others… I feel like the walls and sharp edges which have been my fortress are being slowly worn away, eroding under the weight of the infinite expanding unknown.

Certainties, binaries and ultimate truths which I still cling to more as a reflex than anything are now beds of quicksand – I step confidently and then sink. I know not where I’m going, I question everything and everyone. All the while a mask of confidence hides my face.

I know nothing other than that I want to go on.

Maybe I will find something? Something worth experiencing, worth knowing, worth my time, worth the trust that others have instilled in me… maybe not.

Or worse,

Maybe I will learn something, something shiny and new, but I will not find the means through which to communicate it to the world. Maybe my insight will be lost on others and as a result be lost? Maybe my work will be misunderstood or dismissed all together as beautiful but harmless.

Maybe what we know can only be known by us?